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Call from the Sunflower clinic

When the Sunflower Clinic called Daniel on him home number, they got the following message on his answering machine."Hey, this is Daniel and i am having a great day in the outdoors. The positive thought for the day is LOVE EVERYONE! Leave your name & number and you will hear from me." "Beep".The caller from ...

Grimace

When Susan walked into the living room in curlers and a much-worn night gown, her husband Ruth could not hide a grimace and commented, "How I wish you could look like how you were when we got married."Susan replied, "Yeah? Tell me how can I? I ain't pregnant!"

How fast?

Roy lived in the countryside with his family. One morning, he was helping his buffalo give birth, when he noticed that his daughter, Kelly, was watching the entire event with curious eyes.Roy thought to himself that one day he will have to explain to her about the birds and the bees. Why not grab the ...

Airport embarrassment

This is the story of my friend Joe. Joe was a traveling salesman who would often go out of town on business. One night when Joe returned from a business trip, there was heavy thunder and lightning. He opened the bedroom door and found both his children, Mark and Tina, in bed with his wife. ...

Missing husband

Gina calls the police to report that her husband, John is missing since 3 days. An officer comes to meet her and asked her to describe her missing husband. Gina tells the investigating officer, "John height is 6' 3", very handsome, has thick hair, and a smile that can light up a room."The officer makes ...

Bad weather

Nathan was up early on Sunday morning, dressed up, packed sandwiches for himself, took the dog by the leash, and tip-toed into the garage. He loaded the boat into his Chevrolet pick-up truck, fired it up and drove into the pouring rain. There was heavy snowfall with sharp gusts of wind. ...

A drunkard’s story

Tom was an alcoholic and had been trying to kick the habit. He had joined AA, and with great difficulty, had managed to keep off hard drinks. While running an errand downtown, he passed by a pub and has the urge to have a few quick drinks. He promised himself that he is gonna have ...

Keep the magic alive!

John, Peter and Mike were at the pub enjoying their beer. The topic of discussion was what do they do to keep the magic alive in their marriage.Peter says, "I'll share my secret with you. After a night of great love making, I pluck some jasmine flowers from the garden and place the petals all ...

A strange request

Dr. Robbins, the dentist made a strange request to his patient, Jack. He said, "Jack, please scream at the top of your lungs!"Jack, surprised by the request, said, "But why Dr. Robbins? There's hardly any pain this time."Dr. Robbins pleaded, "Please! You must understand. The waiting room is full of people. I have promised my ...

In the middle!

Aron went to this new fast food joint in Infinity mall. Always demanding by habit, he said to the waiter, "Get me steak, not too rare, not too well done, just right in the middle."His next demand was, "Get me nachos. Not too crispy, not too soggy, but right in the middle."Another order followed, "Get ...